Wednesday, December 12, 2012

Ten Reasons to Dump Your Man

My Christmas gift to all you ladies in the dating game is advice.

First, always respect yourself.

You are the most important person in your life. I know, I know, I hear you saying that you should put others first. In many ways, you're right, but your heart is something that is yours to protect. No one else will care about it as much as you do, and if you're out there not showing any love for yourself by sticking around while he treats you like crap, how can you expect someone else to love you?

So, sit back, relax, enjoy, and remember: intuition is your best friend.

1. He never initiates communication

So you've gone out a few times, you've laughed and joked, you've kissed, and maybe even hung out at his place (or vice versa), but if he never calls—or texts—you first, something's up. 

Maybe he's a poor communicator, but if you feel like everything is one-sided, girls, it probably is. 

2. He never asks about you

When a guy is truly interested in you, he asks questions about your likes and dislikes. He doesn't pretend to listen while you describe the things that make you unique, your passions and desires. 

What's worse? If you start talking about yourself and he cuts you off to talk about him. 

Not good. 

3. He doesn't introduce you to his friends

Okay, so this one is tough. Say you've gone out a few times and really hit it off. He's a great communicator, maybe he has the softest lips of any guy in the world, but if he's truly boyfriend material, he'll introduce you to his friends. This doesn't have to be frequent, but if there is no effort on his part to include you in his life, why stick around? 

4. He acts differently with you around his friends

So he does take you out to meet his friends, maybe even his family, but say he's uncomfortable, rarely looks at you, sits ten feet away. How does that make you feel?

I'm not saying he has to break every PDA rule/law there is—gross—but if he's unwilling to hold your hand or sit next to you, or talk to you while you're out with him and his buddies, chances are he's not that into you.

5. He refuses to commit to you and only you

Say you've passed most of the hurdles I've already mentioned, you've dated for some time and are ready to commit but know he's seeing other people.

Have you brought it up?

If the answer is yes, and his answer was no, then what are you doing?

Good relationships are based on people whose desires are mutual. I'm not saying you have to like all the same things and wear matching sweaters at Christmas; I'm saying that if he doesn't want you and only you, why do you want him and only him?

6. He doesn't take you out

This is slightly different from #3, but equally important. If the only thing you're doing is going over to his place or he's coming to yours, chances are you aren't in a healthy relationship.

Go out. See a movie. Eat at a fancy restaurant. Do something other than *that*.

7. He doesn't share anything personal/emotional about himself

Okay, so you like the guy and he likes you, but you know nothing about him. I'm not talking about what he likes between his sandwich slices either. If you don't know about all the times he was made fun of in high school for his crooked teeth or big nose or small feet (things you find incredibly adorable), then maybe he doesn't feel comfortable talking to you.

Bad sign.

Do you talk to him? Have you shared parts of yourself with him? If not, open up. If he doesn't want to hear it, run away.

8. Refuses to compromise

Think you've beat all those other reasons to dump him? Well, if he refuses to compromise (AKA, he's controlling, stubborn, unwilling to bend at ALL), FLEE!

Need I really explain?

9. Can't say 'I love you'

Been dating for a year? Two? Longer? Haven't heard those three little words that you've so desperately craved hearing?

Have you said it but he can't? Eep! That's scary, and a sign that you two operate on different wavelengths.

10. He cheats on you

This is not something most people can recover from. When someone destroys the trust you have in them, it's really hard to build that back up. And really, what would keep them from doing it again? This is truly the most unforgivable act.

Cheating ruins lives.

Cheating ruins everything.

So, that's it. Think about these things. Add to this list if you have suggestions. And please, love and respect yourself.

<3 Krystal 


Wilde's Fire            -           Wilde's Army              -            Wilde's Meadow


  1. Whew! Matt's a keeper. :)

  2. Did you have any doubts?

  3. Oh wow! Pretty sound advice. Never had a boyfriend so can't add much to the list except love yourself, be yourself, and do what you love. This is nice for future reference. :)

  4. Be you. That's great advice! Thanks for commenting. :-)

  5. Good points, many of which I didn't listen to in my younger days. Now I pay attention to recognising when he's just not that into me! and also Samantha's advice from Sex and the City. Does a relationship make you smile or frown? If it's the latter, start walking.

  6. Ha! Emma, that is great advice. Who knew tv shows could be so brilliant?!

  7. Sometimes they are a sneaky breed so always keep your eyes open. Often times these traits don't rear their ugly face right away.

  8. That's true. Sometimes their acting skills fall slack. ;-)

  9. My so-called fiancé/possibly soon-to-be ex is guilty of a few of those. You can also add to the list: Doesn't kiss you till over two and a half years into the relationship (in spite of having done everything else), still lives with Mommy and Daddy at almost 36, maintained friendly contact with psycho ex in spite of repeated pleas to stop it, made you buy your own engagement ring. At least I get to keep my beautiful black diamond ring no matter what happens, since I bought it!


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...